Paula thinks about how we use our characters’ names in one-to-one dialogue.
Have you ever read dialogue that runs something like this?
“John, I think you should change your tie.”
“Why do you think that, Mary?”
“Because it doesn’t match your shirt, John.”
Okay, that might be a slight exaggeration, but in a couple of books I've read recently, the dialogue sounded unnatural, simply because the characters used each other’s names too much. I’ve also read a comment from an editor that said, “Any story where the characters are constantly addressing each other by name in dialogue drives me crazy and I can’t get through the story. No one talks like that in real life.”
How often do you use someone’s name in a one-to-one conversation? I’ve monitored a few conversations recently as an experiment, but wasn’t surprised when, in the course of these, no one used my first name, and I didn’t use theirs either. Try it for yourself sometime!
When I am talking to one of my friends, I don’t say, “Did you see that film on TV last night, Brenda?” I omit her name. She knows I’m talking to her!
The same should apply in our novels. We need to think carefully about when our characters would call each other by name. As with most things, less is more. I must admit I don’t notice my use of characters’ names when I’m writing, but as soon as I read a chapter out loud, I find I’m deleting the unnecessary use of names.
Obviously, names can be used for effect in some circumstances e.g. when someone is angry (“Oh, for heavens’ sake, Mary—”) or pleading (“Please, John—please don’t go,”). There are also times when using a character’s name in dialogue can help to avoid dialogue tags, since nothing is worse than having to count back through short dialogue comments to work out who is saying what. I’m sure we’ve all done that sometimes!
Even so, we need to avoid the over-use of names, certainly in one-to-one conversations. Where there are three or more people, names are sometimes needed to clarify who is being spoken to. Having someone saying, (e.g.) "What do you think, Mary?" is fine unless everyone is using everyone's else's name. The dialogue would then start to border on the ridiculous! Far better to use some action e.g. John turned to Mary. "What do you think?" We then know that he's talking to Mary, and so using her name isn't necessary.