Being a Libra rising, I always need time to adjust to change, to find a new place (inner space) of balance so I can walk coherently in the world--and in my head.
When my younger CSA partner crashed drunkenly into a building on the farm two weeks ago, I was relieved she was uninjured and the building needed only minor repairs. When she checked into three-day detox, I was happy she was asking for help. When the grapevine reported she did not want to come back to work--that it could make her drink, I panicked. This is a minimum two-person job.
Since then, I have collapsed and revived emotionally. I have determined--and here make a public pronouncement--that I will retire the CSA at the end of this season. I will still garden, but on a much smaller scale. I will take all the energy and effort I have poured into teaching people one-on-one how to garden, and write a book that could teach hundreds or thousands of people how to garden more successfully. I am refocusing. I am not defeated.
By winter, I will step willingly, excitedly into change. I will have time to finish my romance WIP's!