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Jennifer laments her lack of speaking skills...
I’ve spent the past week writing and rewriting something I
think I want to say at a meeting I’m attending. With the amount of time I’ve
taken, you’d think it was some long speech that I have to make, when in truth,
it’s maybe four sentences. But I’ve agonized over these four sentences every
single day.
One reason is that I am going on record and rebuking someone
and I’m trying to balance on the fine line of giving my opinion while still
sounding rational and not intentionally hurting anyone.
The biggest reason, however, is that I’m speaking it, not
writing it. I hate public speaking. I’m the stereotypical introverted writer.
I’d much rather speak to my characters in my head than to a roomful of people.
In my head, everything works out fine and I have the exact
words available at the perfect time. My retorts are perfect too. But I know
that if I rely on what’s in my head, when the time comes, I’ll forget what I
want to say, how I want to say it, and lose my point in the morass.
That’s why writing is so great. I can write and revise to my
heart’s content. I can bend and shape the words until I get across the exact
point I want to make. I can give my characters the perfect response, when in
reality, I wouldn’t think of the perfect response for hours or days after the
fact, long after the opportunity had passed.
Public speakers are taught how to speak, to make eye contact
and to use gestures to make their point. But I’m weak at public speaking, and
my point is too important to get lost. So I’m going to rely on my writing
skills—such as they may be—to make my point.
And hope that my words are enough.
Good luck, Jen!
ReplyDeleteLaboring over the words like you are shows how much you care. That will come through at the meeting.
Yes, but writing is so much easier than speaking, even though sometimes the writing doesn't come easily at all. I hate that chasm between what I hear in my head and what gets onto the page, whether it's for a meeting or a book!
ReplyDeleteAgree about writing being easier than speaking. The best 'speeches' I've ever given are in my mind - on the way home from an event, when I know exactly what I should have said, but didn't!
ReplyDeleteGood luck with your four sentences!
I have the same problem, Paula!
DeleteI don't mind speaking in public, but I do write everything out first and practice and practice and practice. And even then sometimes it doesn't come off quite like I planned it. But I try to practice for 'ad-lib' situations as well.
ReplyDeleteGood luck, Jen. I'm sure you'll do fine!
Thanks, Debra. I made my point and now I'm done.
DeleteI identify! When my fingers are tapping across the keyboard the word I want seems to pop into my head. When speaking to a group, even just to make a comment or in conversation, the word I want eludes me. It's very frustrating. I rarely had this difficulty in the comfort of my own classroom, but put me in front of a group of others - the word is gone! Agonizing over your words shows how important the message is for you. Practice will help, but you also must be able to focus on what others say for your response to be appropriate and appear natural and unrehearsed. Tell yourself in the mirror a few times. You'll be right! Please let us know how you get on. :)
ReplyDeleteThanks so much, Norah. I made my speech and was able to respond to the comments as well. Of course, it wasn't as good as it was in my head, but I survived!
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