When I wrote my early novels, a chaste kiss was all that was allowed! By the time I came back back to writing fiction again, the whole world had changed and it took me a while to get used to writing love scenes. My very first effort was described by a friend as 'a bit like a 1940's movie where the action moves away from the couple to a curtain wafting in the breeze.'
Gradually I got a bit more daring (and less inhibited)- I think 'Jed and Abbey' from 'The West Wing' helped me there!
But I still don't like (and wouldn't write) graphic descriptions, use of the coarser words for the male and female anatomy, or 'one-nights stands'/'sex for the sake of it' scenes.
I prefer my sex scenes to be part of a loving relationship, the culmination of a long foreplay where the hero and heoine have been falling in love with each other. That, to me, is the essence of a romance novel.